


love of a jealous kind

by redluxite (wordstruck)



Series: VLD One-Shots [25]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Background Shiro/Adam, Fake Dating Matt/Keith, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Infidelity (kind of??), Jealous Shiro (Voltron), M/M, Pining Shiro (Voltron), Pre-Canon, Pre-Kerberos Mission, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-02 08:12:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16783096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordstruck/pseuds/redluxite
Summary: The thing is, Keith promised it was fake, but here they are in a secluded corner of the library, behind the reference texts no one ever needs. And Shiro is looking at them – at Keith’s kiss-bruised lips, at his mussed-up hair, at his shirt slightly rucked up and wrinkled.(No, that’s a lie. Shiro’s not looking at them.He’s just looking at Keith.)(Pre-canon/divergent, fake dating!Katt AU)





	love of a jealous kind

**Author's Note:**

> So Andy has this **[Fake Dating Matt/Keith AU](https://twitter.com/pejaposarambi/status/1068128585620353024)** going on, which is GREAT, and I need to get myself back into the rhythm of writing again bc I have projects to finish, and the world honestly needs more jealous/pining Shiro, so! I took their AU and mushed it into a fic. Thank u Andy for letting me write this out.
> 
> (Or, as I told them, Andy provided the food and I just cooked it.)
> 
> Title taken from Jealous Kind by Jars of Clay, which I was playing a lot (plus Miss Atomic Bomb by The Killers) while writing this. Fic mostly unbeta'd; will edit as needed.
> 
> Mind the tags, please. And enjoy!

* * *

The thing is: Keith said it was fake.

The dating, the touches, the kissing – it’s meant to be fake. A show for everyone else, a long-running and in-depth prank that they’re playing on the Garrison. It’s why they’re so public; it’s why they make such a fuss about each other when everyone is there to see.

Except here – here, no one’s around to see.

Except here, Matt has his hands up Keith’s shirt as he bites Keith’s bottom lip, and Shiro feels ice in his lungs.

The thing is, Keith promised it was fake, but here they are in a secluded corner of the library, behind the reference texts no one ever needs. And Shiro is looking at them – at Keith’s kiss-bruised lips, at his mussed-up hair, at his shirt slightly rucked up and wrinkled.

(No, that’s a lie. Shiro’s not looking at them.

He’s just looking at Keith.)

They’re both breathing hard but looking at Shiro sheepishly. Keith, in particular, looks alarmed and maybe a little guilty under the flush of his skin. His mouth looks kiss-slick and kiss-pink, and the longer Shiro stares, the more the feeling in his chest turns from ice to something more hot and red. So he looks away.

“Hi,” Matt says, grinning nervously. He’s still got his hands on Keith, on his waist, under his shirt.

Shiro rather wants to tear him away.

“The library is no place for this,” he says instead, and even to himself, he sounds remarkably calm.

The two cadets duck their heads, chagrined. Keith reacts first.

“Shiro—”

Shiro’s glare finally works, and those hands leave Keith’s skin. He breathes out. Purses his lips.

“You should be studying,” he goes on, still not looking both of them in the face. “Not doing – this.” He gestures at the two cadets, at the state of them, at where they both are. His hand doesn’t shake.

(He’s trying not to think about why he’d peeked in the first place. He’d only found them because he’d been looking for a book and a small noise had caught his attention. An insignificant noise, really; just a little gasp, then the tiniest moan. He’d just been curious.

But now he knows. Now he’s realized _who_ made that sound, that soft, surprised hitch of breath. Now he’s aware of what Keith sounds like when he’s being kissed.)

Both Keith and Matt are still looking mostly at the floor, and they keep their heads down as Shiro herds them away from that isolated corner and into the corridor outside. His voice is cold as he tells them _don’t let me catch you again;_ his jaw is rigid and set as he watches them shuffle off. And in truth, part of him wants to call them back – to ask them questions, to ask if this is all _really_ a lie, to demand what that display was for. Part of him wants to know.

He inhales sharp and shaky.

He walks away.

(And if Adam looks at him with concern later on, in their quarters; if Adam sits there quiet but expectant, worried about what’s bothering him – it’s not like Shiro can say. He doesn’t have the right to feel like this, to feel—

Angry. Guilty. Like something’s pressing down on his chest.

Like he actually has a say in who Keith gets to kiss.

So he doesn’t tell Adam, and he tells himself that it’s not his problem, it’s not. Keith isn’t doing anything wrong. Keith is allowed to play around and kiss other people. Keith should be making the most of his youth and Shiro – Shiro should be standing aside and just making sure he’s safe.

He swallows around the lump in his throat and sighs.

He’ll apologize to Keith tomorrow.)

“I’m sorry,” Keith says the next day, in the smallest voice.

It makes Shiro wince. He’d asked Keith out on a ride so that _he_ could apologize; he’d never meant for Keith to be so quiet and subdued the whole trip over, or to apologize first. He looks at Keith now, the way the cadet bites his lip and stares out at the desert, heels kicking nervously at the sides of his hoverbike. He hates that he’s made Keith feel bad.

“Keith,” Shiro starts, because he really does feel—

“We were just practicing.”

Shiro’s mouth snaps shut. He doesn’t quite feel bad anymore.

“Practicing,” he says, through gritted teeth.

Color floods Keith’s cheeks. Shiro tries not to think of how flushed the other boy had been yesterday, just from being kissed.

“Uh.” Keith coughs and ducks his head. “I’m – I’m really not supposed to tell you this, but, uh, next weekend some students are gonna go up to the terrace for a, ah – collective spring date after curfew, and—”

(Oh.)

“—and Matt wants to go, and some girls who annoy me are gonna be there, so—”

( _Oh._ )

Keith cuts himself off and shifts on the hoverbike so he’s sitting sideways, looking at Shiro. He bites his lip. Shiro tries not to think of how Matt had had it between his teeth.

“They’re gonna expect us to be more, uh.” Keith coughs again. “ _Loving_ than usual, so.” He shrugs. “I know you’re not happy about him and me, but I’m being left alone, and—”

“That’s okay.” Shiro’s quick to cut him off, because he _really_ doesn’t want to hear more about how Keith and Matt’s relationship works. He smiles tightly and steps over, settles a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “I’m, ah – I’m sorry I got mad.”

He hopes he sounds sincere, and he probably passes, because Keith’s expression brightens. “Oh, good,” he sighs, clearly relieved. “I’m sorry about the library, though. Matt wanted to go to his bedroom, but I wasn’t, ah—” His blush deepens as he hunches up a little, suddenly shy.

( _Holy shit._ )

“The library is fine,” Shiro croaks, body slightly rigid. “It’s – fine. Fine. I won’t tell.”

Keith smiles at him. “Yeah?” He looks so uncertain, so sweet. “Are we good?”

Shiro’s answering smile feels much more brittle.

“We’re good.”

They drive back after a while, and Keith is much less tense now. He laughs easily as he accelerates past Shiro, hair blown back by the rush of wind. His _good night_ comes easily, trusting.

Shiro watches him leave for the cadet dorms. The weight on his chest is becoming all too familiar a feeling.

The secret collective spring date is discovered, and subsequently cancelled.

 _Technically,_ Shiro didn’t snitch to Iverson or any of the commanding officers.

He _may_ have slipped in front of his boyfriend, though. And Adam _does_ happen to be a teacher.

Pity, really.

The weight on his chest eases.

Keith beats another of his scores on the flight simulator the next week. Shiro finds out when Aya cuffs him on the head and ribs him for it, grinning. He laughs and says, well, the kid’s going to beat all his scores eventually.

The pride lingers as he gets up and gathers his things. Keith’s flight class will be ending soon; Shiro thinks he might head over to the sim room to congratulate his friend. On the way over, he runs into Matt.

The other cadet looks every inch a very proud boyfriend. He smiles at Shiro in greeting; Shiro is decidedly a little less warm as he nods in reply. They fall into step together.

The walk to the sim room suddenly feels painfully longer.

Eventually, Matt breaks the silence.

“Hey, Shiro,” he says. “I think we should talk about this fake dating thing Keith and I have going on.”

Shiro’s hands twitch. He’d been trying not to think about it, but now he’s just remembered something.

“Yes, actually, we should.” He pauses his steps, turns to Matt. “What was this about wanting to take Keith to your bedroom?”

Matt’s considerably less graceful as he stumbles to a halt. “Oh.” He looks decidedly uncomfortable. “He told you that, huh.”

Shiro looks at him pointedly. Matt clears his throat. “Look, just – I’ve never kissed with tongue before—”

(Shiro bites his own.)

“—so I wanted a more private place where we could embarrass ourselves and fuck up without issue.”

(Shiro winces at the word _fuck_.)

“Keith didn’t like the idea,” Matt confesses with a shrug.

“Wise of him,” Shiro says, and starts walking again.

He catches Matt looking at him slantwise for a moment, before the cadet trots after him to catch up. “Funny enough,” Matt adds, as if this conversation isn’t already over, “after you caught us, Keith got really anxious about whether you were mad. He agreed to the bedroom thing for next time.”

Shiro doesn’t stumble. It’s a near thing.

“Except.” _Christ,_ Matt’s still going. “There’s no need for a next time.”

There is no spark of relief in Shiro’s chest. There isn’t.

“The thing we were practicing more is kind of not happening anymore.” Matt glances at Shiro out of the corner of his eye, cocking a brow. “Wouldn’t happen to know why, would you?”

The sim room is entirely too far away; Shiro doesn’t understand how they’re _still_ walking there. He’s starting to feel a little trapped in this conversation, too. Fighting to keep his composure in check, Shiro coughs into his fist and assumes a neutral expression. “I didn’t tell Iverson.”

“I didn’t say you did.”

( _Fuck._ )

Matt glances away casually. “Anyway,” he continues, like he hasn’t suddenly made Shiro feel like his veins are made of ice, “I just wanted to remind you that Keith and I have a deal. He gets people off his back, and once he dumps me, I’ll get a whole bunch of girls wanting to console a poor, heartbroken boy.”

Shiro smothers a wince.

“I don’t like that you’re lying,” he says. It’s a poor attempt at deflection.

Matt sees right through it. “ _I_ like the attention I’ve been getting so far.” He raises his chin, narrowing his eyes at his friend. “I just didn’t expect any from you.”

Shiro comes to another stop, completely thrown. “What—”

The cadet comes to a stop too, arms crossing over his chest. He fixes Shiro with a pointed look. “You need to stop acting like a jealous ex around me and Keith.”

Shiro opens his mouth. Closes it. Opens it again. “What are you—”

Matt snorts. “I said quit it with the jealousy tantrums.” He purses his lips, then his expression softens. “Shiro, I know we’re friends—”

Shiro tenses. “Where is this—”

“—and you’re a great guy, and my whole family loves you. Heck, even _I_ love you.” He drops his arms, rubs a hand over his neck. “Just, uh, not like _that._ ”

And that – Shiro stares at Matt. He can practically _feel_ the gears crunching in his own head, because did Matt just – did he just say—

He makes an aborted laugh, even as something punches him in the gut, because – “Matt. Matt, I have a boyfriend.”

(And the way he says it, like he has to remind himself, too. He shouldn’t need reminding.)

Matt pats him on the arm. “I know. And I like Adam.” His expression turns a little _too_ sheepish. “I just don’t want to be a homewrecker.”

“A what.” Shiro has lost thread of this conversation entirely.

“But more importantly,” Matt adds, as if he hasn’t lost Shiro entirely, “Keith is moping because you’re so snappy all the time. Like I said, he’s anxious that you’re mad at him.”

For all that Shiro is comprehending him, Matt might as well be speaking Chinese.

“He’s my friend as well as my boyfriend, you know?” Matt points out. Shiro’s hand closes into a fist. “I know you’d grass my ass, but keep this up and you’re gonna have to meet me in the parking lot.”

Finally, Shiro decides that he needs to get this conversation back on a track he can actually follow. He also really needs to clarify something, because – “did I look that jealous?”

Matt raises an eyebrow. “Are you not?”

“I’m not.”

“I thought you didn’t like lying.”

Shiro covers his flinch with a glare. Matt looks back at him unfazed.

“All I’m saying is you need to remember this,” and he gestures at himself, then in the direction of the sim room, “isn’t going to last. So just – keep it together and act normal. It’ll blow over soon.” He claps Shiro on the shoulder. “And Keith really cares a lot about what you think of him.”

That has Shiro feeling chagrined, as he remembers Keith’s guilty expression from their hoverbike ride. He sighs. “I know. I’m sorry.”

Matt nods, satisfied. He tilts his head towards the end of the corridor. They resume their walk in silence.

When they get to the sim room, though, the cadet nudges Shiro with his elbow just as they reach the door.

“I was just teasing,” he says, smiling impishly.

Shiro blinks at him. He doesn’t like that look.

“You don’t give a shit about me,” and the smile is widening, turning smug, and the realization dawns on Shiro that Matt has seen right through him. “You’re just jealous I get to put my hands on Keith, but you don’t.”

(Shiro can’t reply, can’t move, can’t breathe.)

“Keith thinks I’m the one you’re interested in, though,” Matt goes on, and _oh,_ Shiro is so fucked. He tries to find something to say. He finds nothing. Matt’s expression turns from self-satisfied to something decidedly more menacing.

“Still,” he says, and every word is polite but every word feels like betrayal. “You have a boyfriend, don’t you, Shiro? So make up your mind. Keith deserves better.”

And with that parting shot, he pushes the door open and leaves Shiro there, frozen. Leaves Shiro to watch as Matt jogs over to where Keith’s standing in the middle of a small crowd, flustered and awkward amid all the congratulations.

Leaves Shiro to watch as Matt grins, calls out “good job, babe.”

Leaves Shiro to watch as Matt hauls Keith into a kiss.

The room erupts into whispers. The instructor yells a warning. Keith leans into the kiss, just a little.

Matt opens his eyes and looks straight at Shiro.

His hand dips just a little lower on Keith’s back.

Shiro presses his lips into a tight, tight line. The weight is back there on his chest and he can’t breathe.

He walks away from the room.

**Author's Note:**

> Thamks very much for reading uwu 
> 
> Come say hi on social media!! I'm [@okw_tr](https://twitter.com/okw_tr) on Twitter and [okwtr](https://okwtr.tumblr.com) on Tumblr ^ ^ I post a lot of WIPs, updates on ongoing/future projects, and stuff about Sheith. You can also check there for ways to support my writing!


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